Monday, January 21, 2013

Coming Home

On June 17, 2008, Albert, Emmitt, and I moved to Herning, Denmark to start our new life with Mads. And on June 17, 2008, it was the RIGHT decision for us. To be married to a Dane means that you need to learn about Danish culture, about Danish traditions, and yes, it also means you've got to learn the Danish language. We knew that the best place for those things to happen was in Denmark, so I left my career, my family, my comfort zone, and most importantly, my daughter, and moved five thousand miles across the world.

I also left my ability to be with my family when I NEEDED to be with my family. But such is the life of an expat. It is a choice we make when we decide to pick up our lives and move to a new country...

There are many times, more than I hope and pray are normal for most expats, that I have really FELT the 5,000 miles between me and my family in these last 4.5 years because six weeks after I moved here, my dad had a heart attack, followed by a quadruple bypass operation. And then eight weeks after I moved here, my MoMo died.

Add to that my having a miscarriage, Jess being involved in a near-fatal car accident, my dad being diagnosed with esophageal cancer, my mom being diagnosed with breast cancer, and my precious grand baby being born into the world....  Because you see, even with the good and awesome things, like a new granddaughter, an expat FEELS THE DISTANCE and it hurts. 

Last spring, when Jess told us she was pregnant, Mads and I began making mental plans of when we could try to move back to Texas and at that point, our goal was to try and be back by Christmas 2014, just after Corrie's 2nd birthday. It seemed like a great plan. We could finish our commitments here and be back in Texas just in time to really watch her grow into the amazing person she is going to be.....

But then in the same week that Corrie was born, we received some news that shook our world. As you know, that is the week that my mom was diagnosed with Stage 3 Pancreatic Cancer, and that is the moment when our plans began to change and began to change very quickly. No longer could we wait because in that week we were confronted with the realization of how precious each moment of each day really is. Yes, we already KNEW that, but until you hear the words PANCREATIC CANCER, you don't really grasp the value of those precious moments because as you all know....pancreatic cancer is most often caught too late. This does not mean that we will lose my mom tomorrow, or next month or even in the next few years (because I plan on having her around for a very long time to watch Corrie grow up with me), but it DOES mean that it is time to go home. NOW. No more waiting. No more separation. No more distance.


Mads and I, unfortunately may have to live apart for just a little while, much like we did in the early stages of our relationship, but it will just be for a little while.... I will know more about timelines and dates in the coming weeks and when I do, I will be glad to share the details, but I don't want our news today to be clouded with all that minutiae right now. 

I want this news to be a CELEBRATION of what is happening in our lives. Like the song says...... I AM COMING HOME and Texas is pretty lucky because I am bringing this incredible Viking with me.




10 comments:

Amy said...

Wishing you all the best- as always- my friend <3

Babs said...

Good for you. Many of your avid followers will be glad to hear you will be home with your daughter and family soon. It has been an incredibly painful story to witness. You were only here in Denmark a short time, but you made the most of it and touched many people. In the years to come you will look back and remember with fondness. One of the main reasons foreigners leave Denmark is to be with their family, if they can, and nobody will blame you for needing to do the same. Best wishes for the future xxxx

Jono said...

Always wishing you and your family the best. I hope things go well.

Michael said...

Wow that sounds exciting - best of luck to your all! It's been great following your adventures in Denmark.

Lisbeth said...

Having a "geographically split" (or geographically challenged) life has its own logic but one thing is for sure: you should plan to be where it feels the most right for the time being and/or in the time to come.

Good luck on settling all the practicalities!

Jan said...

It is going to be tough to be apart, but I am glad you are going home! You will never regret the time you spend with your mom and your girls!!! Best of luck to you! :-)

ladyfi said...

I guessed you might be moving back. My sister's husband's daughter has just had a child and they've decided to move back to be nearer her... and of course, the rest of my family living in the UK.

The distance is a killer, they say, although they love their lives in Australia.

Wishing you much love and luck in your move.

nettielouise said...

Kelli...I know so many people who will be so glad to have you back here (myself included), but I can only imagine how hard things are for you right now and how tough this decision is. If there s anything at all I can do to help you in this transition, just let me know! Hugs!

Kirstin Berge said...

Wow, Kelli.
I'm truly happy for you that you and Mads will be able to work stuff out asap to go back and be with your family again. :) I'll miss you on the expat sphere though!
You better keep blogging, even when you're back in Texas!
You're all in my prayers. Love you.

Lovely Light said...

Big choice- good for you!. I know that we will have to make a decision like that one day. Living in South Africa has been tough- being so far away from family. My hubby's father just died two weeks ago, and we couldn't afford to fly and be there :( Makes you really want to re-evaluate whats important.